Home Again

So yesterday I got home at around 10:00 and I was so happy! New York and Texas are completely different and I really didn't like sharing a bed with my cousin because I barely know her and it was just weird sleeping in a bed with somebody you barely know.

I didn't get the chance to blog yesterday but can you blame me? After traveling for 11 hours I was exhausted and worried because I didn't want my mp3 player to run out of power before I reached home, otherwise it would be a long trip before I got home.

I took a few pictures of things that people wanted, like: the lone star, a pony, a cowboy boot, a cowboy hat etc. I don't know when I'll be able to show everybody their gifts and I haven't exactly thought about it. Right now there are other things I need to get through. After a lot of thought I decided that since I've bugged Salad enough about the girls he likes and his stuff maybe I should tell him something that a lot of other people have been trying to find out about. I've been thinking about telling him about it for awhile but I just now think that I'm ready to do it. I'm sure if I told Frank he would be skeptical about it since it is a touchy subject that has so many other problems attached to it. But over the break, on that one night where I had my cousin's room to myself I started thinking about that (probably because I had a nightmare about it the night before) and after much thought I decided that if anybody should know besides Frank (who already knows) it would have to be Salad, George and maybe Aaron...actually no...just Salad and George. Aaron would be just like Kate and Angie would and I don't want that, I want people who will still be the same around me, without worrying. And it's a known fact that boys are less likely to think about that stuff than girls are...they are less likely to care (Frank and Cael are perfect examples of that but they still reacted differently) which is fine because I'd probably cry if somebody kept asking me about it, and I don't want that. I've had the reputation of cry baby before and I don't want to get it again, which means I will stay strong and to stay strong I can't tell this to anybody who will make a big deal about it and will see me and try to make me feel good or will change what they do because I'm around.

I don't want that and I don't think I deserve that kind of compassion about this.